Recently while browsing some web sites I happened upon a site dedicated to ex-Christians. Its purpose was to publish the stories of people who no longer profess to be Christian. Some now embraced atheism and others turned to another religion. Each person told their story of why they renounced their faith. I read of their pain, heartbreak and anger towards God. It broke my heart. Some of the scenarios I have heard many times over. Many had turned away due to common misconception about God or some sort of misunderstanding. Others had been the victims of religious abuse. And still others struggled due to the various scriptural interpretations that abound, to put it nicely.

I'm no stranger to hard times. I've spent a lot of time walking through the low valleys of life in lack, being misunderstood and excluded. Perhaps my hard times weren't as hard as some, but my limits have been pushed many times. I've been in that place of confusion wondering why nothing was working out the way I had envisioned or desired. It seemed as though everyone else around me was getting exactly what he or she wanted out of life, but I was always left behind. Many times I was tempted to give up and forget about any sort of relationship with God. So I can relate to many of the individuals on this web site and their hardships. At times my faith hung by a thread, and the only thing that got me through those times was a hope for tomorrow. It was my belief that God was going to bless me, and tomorrow might be the day He would do it.

Living for God is not always easy. There are many hazards which may cause Christians to fall away from their faith, and we must all be diligent to seek God for His guidance and understanding. Time and again I have seen many people struggle and fall away because of these hazards. So in this article I would like to address a few of these issues and hopefully give you a different perspective of them.

One such hazard is the belief that everything goes your way when you are a Christian; God makes all of life just how we want it, and everything is great. This just isn't so, and anyone who believes this is in for a rude awakening. Christians go through tough times just like anyone else. The truth of the matter is, God will make a good and prosperous way for us through this life, but it won't necessarily be what we expected. God intends to bless us and will give us the desires of our hearts. But like any good parent, He will not give His Children anything that will harm them. He gives them the proper things at the proper times. God does make life great, but that greatness begins in knowing Him intimately. Nothing we ever desire is as great as knowing our Lord and Savior intimately. And when we put God first, He will then fulfill the deepest desires of our hearts.

When we have a need or desire, most of us have a certain order of steps we use to try and fill those needs or desires. But sometimes our order of steps is backwards. And this lack of proper order is one of the biggest reasons people fall away. For example, when people are in need they will often do the following...

- First, they sometimes let God know of their need/desire.
- Second, they conceive a plan of action to get what they desire.
- Third, they go forward trying to accomplish their plans.
- And fourth, they ask God to make what they have planned a reality.

This is backwards, and often God will not honor it. The reason being, the plans we make are not always what is best for us. God wants to give us the best. Also, God wants to be number one in our lives. He wants us to always come to Him first. If we want to receive God's best, the actions we should take are...

- First we should ask God to fill this need or desire.
- Second, we should wait for His direction and instruction concerning the issue.
- And third, after receiving God's instruction, we should go forward doing what He said to do, when He said to do it, being patient and confident in God's abilities and faithfulness.

This, God will honor. This is seeking first His Kingdom and His Righteousness.

Matthew 6:33 - But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

Everyone who seeks first His kingdom without giving up, will have their prayers answered.

There is a common saying, "Heaven helps those who help themselves." There is some truth in this saying, but it is often misapplied. People often use it as justification to conceive their own plans of action and act upon them. But all they will succeed in doing is making themselves frustrated and angry with God. Anything God conceives and plans He will achieve in your life if you are willing to do as He says. But anything conceived and planned in the heart and mind of man is unlikely to receive God's stamp of approval. God's plans to bless and prosper you will be realized in your life if you do what He says to do it. But your plans for prosperity are unlikely to succeed. Therein lies the main conflict. Are you doing what God says to do? Or are you working to try and obtain what you want in your own ways and in your own strength, occasionally asking God to help you out?

I often hear people say, "God let me down" or "He left me when He said He wouldn't." That just isn't true. If these individuals were honest with themselves, most would agree that it would be more accurate to say, "God didn't live up to my expectations of performing as I had planned." I have seen so many people plan their way, do their own thing, and then blame God when their plans don't work. So many never truly sought God for direction concerning their situation, and did as He directed. Often they argue that they did ask God to help, and He did nothing. But asking God to help with your plans isn't the way God works. God isn't a genie in a bottle giving you what you desire when you call on Him. And when people's plans don't work out, they shake their fists at God and say, "You did this!" That just isn't true. God didn't have any part in it; they never let Him do anything. They just wanted God to give them things, and He doesn't work that way. If you feel this way, or have fallen away due to similar situations, please listen to me. God is not responsible for the lack of fulfillment of your plans, even if you acknowledged Him and asked Him for help. He had nothing to do with it. To blame God and turn away from Him for something He wasn't responsible for only does you even more harm. He loves you deeply and unconditionally. And the reason He didn't make your plans work out is because He has something better for you.

Sometimes Christians fall away because of other people. Maybe they were abused or condemned by other Christians. Maybe they were made to feel unworthy. Or maybe they just never felt loved or accepted. If that has been the case for you, whether you are Christian or have left the faith, then I want to say I'm am sorry that happened to you. It shouldn't have. But we live in an imperfect world. And I want you to know that God is not responsible for how others treated you. Nor does He agree with bad things people have done to you. He doesn't condemn you, He doesn't hate you, He loves you and He accepts you. And if you hold God responsible for how you were treated by other people, then I ask you to take a really hard look at what you are doing. Turning away from God because of what another person did to you is similar to divorcing your husband or wife for the same reason. If a friend of your husband or wife were to treat you badly, would you get a divorce because of if? Of course not. So why would you turn away from God? It makes no sense. Yet so many have done just that. Many people have turned away from God saying, "There are no good Christians and I don't want to be around any of them." But I say, instead of turning away, why don't you become that "good Christian" you are looking for? Why don't you determine to raise the standard? Why don't you learn of God, and let Him make in you the Godly characteristics He wishes for His children to have? A relationship with God is a relationship directly with God. It is not subject to your relationship with other Christians. So don't let others take away from your personal relationship with God Himself.

Perhaps you are saying to yourself, "Well God shouldn't have let those people treat me that way, therefore He is responsible." To this, there is no good response that hurting or embittered people would find acceptable. Perhaps He wouldn't violate their free will. Perhaps He was allowing you to go through this situation to help mold you into the image of Christ. Or perhaps God never intended for you to be there to begin with. The possibilities are numerous depending on the situation, and far too deep to get into here. But at the core of dealing with such situations is faith in God. Faith in God covers our lack of understanding. To know and truly believe God intends to bless us gives us the ability to move beyond our adversities. Do you have to understand the function of every little part of a car to ride in it? Of course not. You just have to know that it is reliable, and will get you to your destination. Listen... God is reliable, and He will get you to your destination. And when you put your faith in Him you can move beyond the adversities, questions and doubts, and you will gain a peace that surpasses all understanding. But you have to make the conscious decision to trust God and seek after Him, not letting things that oppose God's word to sway you. Those who do not give up and do not give in to adversity will be the ones to see God's promises manifested in their life.

Galatians 6:9 - And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.

Some choose not to accept The Bible as God's word believing it is full of contradictions, but this isn't true. Where there seems to be a contradiction, there tends to be a lack of information to strike a balance between the two sides. For example, two people are talking about Mary Jane. The first person says that Mary Jane is a blonde, but the second person says that Mary Jane is a brunette. Who is telling the truth? Well, they both are. What we didn't know was that Mary Jane is a natural brunette, but had changed her hair color to blonde. Both statements were true, but you had to have more information to understand the perspective of each. It's the same with The Bible.

Some believe The Bible was composed and written by man, rather than being the inspired word of God. There is no good way to prove physically, mathematically, or scientifically whether The Bible is or isn't God's word. That's not to say there is no way to do so. What I am saying is, people have a tendency to believe what they want to believe. They are drawn to conclusions that appeal to their sense of logic, their desires, or their pre-conceived beliefs.

There are many streams of logic in the world. Some contradict each other, some appeal to us more than others, but most are logical by human standards. Perhaps you find creationism logical. Or perhaps you find the big bang theory logical. Both are valid streams of logic, but we all choose between the two according to what we find more logical to us. But the real heart of the matter is; what inspires your choices of logic? Are you influenced by what you can see, hear and comprehend? Are you influenced by past experiences? Are you influenced by preconceived ideas or assumptions? Are you influenced by a very narrow cross section of people? Are you influenced by past hurts, disappointments, anger, or some other emotion?

The main thing I am trying to convey is, don't make the mistake of forming your own truth based on your own knowledge, understanding and perceptions. Lets face it; our understanding is limited at best. Be an honest truth seeker. Too many would rather seek to prove the truth they desire, rather than seeking the real truth.

Please listen to me; no matter how logical, no matter how solid a contrived system of beliefs seem, it will never ever bring true complete peace or joy. There is an ultimate truth to be had, but you can't find that truth if you are constantly distracting yourself from it with your own desires. The world's state of being is a testimony to logic gone awry. We are reaping the consequences of God's undiscovered and unaccepted truth, which is ultimately what is wrong in the world.

Many have fallen into these pitfalls. But the thing I found the most interesting; while reading through the stories of these ex-Christians I found a common thread. None of them received what they desired to have. Each of them, in one way or another, spoke of unfulfilled desires. Essentially, they fell away because they didn't get what they wanted. And I feel for them because I know some earnestly, desperately and painfully needed these things. They wanted to be loved and cared for. They wanted to matter to someone. They wanted peace. They wanted a break from their pains, heartaches and hard times. And it was during those times little whispers came to fill their ears, bringing discouragement and deepening their wounds. They felt alone and abandoned, and many to give up and fell away.

I know what that is like. It isn't fun. In fact, sometimes it is down right horrible. If you are in such a place of despair, or have turned away from Christ because of such hardships, then from one person who has been through hard and desperate times to another - I have found that in the midst of the hardest most gut wrenching times of life, nothing compares to knowing The Lord Jesus Christ intimately. Nothing is more of a comfort, and nothing brings deep peace like knowing Him does. He is the fulfillment of all your needs and desires. Perhaps you have focused your attention on something you desired believing that having it would make you happy, but you just become weary in waiting for it. You would not become weary in focusing your attention on Jesus. The Lord can be trusted to take care of the things you need and desire; He wants to give you these things, He is a Good God. But He can't fulfill your desires if you focus on them instead of Him. He wants you to desire Him more than the things He is well able to give you. He wants to be loved and needed just as you want to be loved and needed. He wants to show you that He is much more to you than just a provider of your needs and desires. Nothing compares to the greatness of knowing The Lord Jesus Christ intimately. Please don't take that lightly. I know it can be hard for some to understand how that could possibly be true. But it is my testimony and my experience that knowing God intimately is greater, more fulfilling, and much more valuable than having our hearts desires. Nothing in all of existence can compare to knowing Him.

I know there must be some out there saying, "I've tried Christianity, I've tried following God, but it just doesn't work for me." I'm not saying this to be mean or hurtful in any way, but the only way following God "doesn't work" is if we are unwilling to do it His way. That is the only way it doesn't work. But if we do it His way, we will have a deep intimate relationship with Him, and every promise from God plus our heart's desires will be fulfilled which will be the icing on the cake. It starts with a choice; a choice that is before us all. Seek to obtain what we desire, or seek to know and lay hold of God Himself.

Matthew 6:33 - But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.



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